Worrying

It is very late but I don’t want to go to bed because HB isn’t here. HB is in London and I detest being in the house alone. The children are asleep and have been for hours, so it’s just me and the music.

I’m listening to a stunningly beautiful piece of music called “Spiegel im Spiegel” by Estonian composer, Arvo Part. It’s the closest I’ve ever heard music get to the feeling of breathing. It’s very simple, just piano and violin and I swear you can hear each string sigh as the bow brushes gently across them. 

The title apparently translates as “mirror in the mirror” which perfectly describes the idea of endless repetition which occurs in the piece. It only lasts about ten minutes. Go listen to it.

Anyway, got an intense dislike for being the only adult in the house at night. Every noise is magnified, and they all sound like someone creeping about downstairs. When the kids were wee and HB was away, I used to stay awake until they woke up and wandered through to our room. Only once we were all in the same room could I relax and sleep.

Overactive imagination, I know, hence the relaxing music, and some writing and staying up late until you’re too tired to worry about anything except sleep.

So far, it’s not working.